every story has an ending.

finally doneee!!! :D WOOOHOOO!!!! awesome moment man. so tired O.O supposed to wake up for open house in a few minutes time. :S ahhh. gonna spend these few seconds wisely man. cant believe its the june hols already O.O heh heh, wouldnt it be awesome if you the ability to control time? that would be soo amazing. heh gonna sleep now. ahh. night!!! :D

shawty is cool like fire, cool like fire

again and again. someone please tie me up before its too late, hold me back.

thanksss siti for the song recommendation xD it rockss man!! :D

every moment being brought up.
is that very moment being brought down.

im starting to feel weaker as each passing day.
im losing my control over my emotions.
im losing my inspiration.
im losing my mind.
my heads starting to hurt.
what the hell is wrong with me.
coming home each day and getting distracted so easily.
its not early nor is it late
my final years are already coming up.
argh. i cant take it anymore.
come on. focus.

im really confused.
whats real and whats not.
whats meant to be and whats not meant to be there.
so many feigning faces in this world,
all just plain lies,
just lies.
everyone hopes eagerly for the truth.
but is there someone out there who holds no lies themselves?
think bout it.

why is there even this cold war? im so sorry

Its not the fall that hurts but when you hit the ground.

school later O.O kinda having problems stuffing my books in my bag, heh. ahh strange problem to encounter in this time of the night xD aw man. really in love with dbsk :D they dont just rock at singing but acting too, check out dangerous love. its super funny, nerve wrecking and cute :D heh heh. alrighto off to sleep, peaceee :]

have saved this email for a pretty long time le. despite it being an ordinary email, its a really touching story. amazing. it may even bring tears to your eyes man. check it out :]

( sorry bout the typos )

Boy: baby we need to talk

Girl: kyle, wat do u mean?

Boy: sumthin has come up...

Girl: wat? Wuts wrong? Is it bad?

Boy: i dont want to hurt u baby

Girl: *thinks* omg i hope he doesnt break up with me... I love him so much

Boy: baby are you there??

Girl: yea im here wut is so important??

Boy: im not sure if i should say

Girl: well u already brought it up, so please just tell me.

Boy: im leaving....

Girl: baby wut are u talking about?? I dont want u to leave me, i love you

Boy: not like that, i mean im moving far away

Girl: why? All of ur famliy lives over here.

Boy: well my father is sending me away to a boarding skool far away.

Girl: i cant believe this.

[FATHER: (picks up the other phone, interrupts & yells furiously) ERiKA, wat did i tell you about talking to boys?!!!!!....Get off the damn phone!! (And hangs up)]

Boy: wow ur father sounds really mad

Girl: u know how he gets, but anywayz i dont want you to go

Boy: would you run away with me?

Girl: baby, u know i would, i would do anything for u, but i cant... U dont know wut would happen if i did. My dad would kill me !!

Boy: *sad* its ok i understand i guess..

Girl: *thinking* i cant believe wuts going on

Boy: i need to give u sumthing 2nite b/c i am leaving on flight 1-80 in tha morning, so i need to see you now.

Girl: ok i will sneak out & meet u at tha park

Boy: ok ill meet u there in 20min

[They meet at a nearby park, they both hug eachother. And he gives her a note.]

Boy: here u go, this is for you i gotta go.

Girl: *tear* (begins to cry)

Boy: baby dont cry, u know i love you...but i have 2 go

Girl: ok (begins to walk away)

[They both go back home. And erika begins to read tha letter he gave her]

It says.....

Erika,

U probably already know that im leaving, i knew this would be better if i wrote a letter explaining tha truth about how much i care about you. The truth is, is that i never loved you, i hated you so much, u are my bitch and dont u ever forget that. I never cared about you, and never wanted to talk to you, and be around u. U really have no clue how much i hate you. Now that im leaving i thought u should know that i hate you bitch, u never did tha right thing, and u were never there. I didnt think i could hate someone as much as i hate you. And i never want to see you, for the rest of my life, i will never miss kissing you like before, i never want to cuddle up, how we used to. I will not miss you and thats a promise. U never had my love, and i want you to remember that. Bitch u keep this letter bcuz this may be tha last thing u have from me. I hate you so much. i will not talk to you soon bitch.... Goodbye

- Kyle

[ erika begins to cry, she throws tha paper in tha garbage & crys for hours ]

....A day passes, she is sad, depressed and she feels so lonely.... Then she gets a fone call....

Friend: how are u feeling?

Girl: i just cant believe this happend i thought he loved me.

Friend: o, about that. Kyle left me a msg. A few days ago. He told me to tell u to look in ur jacket pocket or something...

Girl: ummm ok

[She finds a piece of paper in tha jacket, It says...]

Baby i hope u find this before u read my letter. I knew ur dad might read it, so i switched a few words...

Hate = Love

Never = Alwayz

Bitch = Baby

Will not= will

........ I hope u didnt take that seriously because i love you with all my heart, and it was so hard to let you go thats y i wanted u to run away with me...

-Kyle

Girl: omg its a letter, Kyle does love me!!, he must of slipped it into my pocket when he hugged me. I cant believe how stupid I am!!

Friend: lol ok but i g2g.... Call me later

Girl: *happy*ok bye, i'll be at home waiting for my baby to call me !!

...... Erika turns tha T.V. on......

[Breaking news] 'An airplane has crashed. Over 47 young boys died, we are still searching for Survivors...This is a tragedy we will never forget, this plane was flight 1-80...it was on its way to an all boys boarding school....' Reporter says.

[ she turns off the tv.....3 days later, she kills herself, because of tha fact that Kyle was dead & she had nothing to Live for... ]

....A day after that the phone rings. Nobody answers. It was Kyle, he called to leave a msg. 'Its Kyle, i guess ur not home so, I called to let u know that im alive, i missed my flight b/c i had 2 see u one last time. So i hope ur not worried. I am staying for good. Sorry if u got scared, i promise to make it up to you everything will be a be ok i love you so much...call me asap bye!

the end.

from strong flames to dust and ashes.

cant seem to sleep. so many things kinda stuck in my mind. argh.. so dead. ive already wasted my whole day today. sometimes wishing i could just lie on the road, stare at the clouds during the day and the stars in this beautiful night.

closing ones eyes,
blasting music into ones ears.
the same procedure being carried out all over once again.
my heads starting to hurt.
seeing so many faces and hearing so many voices.
scenes of my life,
actions i regret,
all flashing past my eyes.
please just leave me alone for tonight.
just one night.

one night.
few issues.
one conclusion.

sometimes. i got just shut the freaking hell up.

phone confiscated.

aw man. phone just got confiscated O.O ahhhhhhh. kinda feel really bad for the reason :S sigh. lifes kinda dull without my phone though O.O no radio for now i guess, heh :S well. at least theres no more alarms to disturb the house :]

somehow so amazed by the quality of the camera :D despite from it only being able to store a 15sec video or 11 pics, its super clear larh, well in a small box. heh heh :] noticed it kinda blurs in the com, weird. gonna get this chance to goof around and snap a few shots before its taken away O.O modules for the past few days have been pretty awesome especially with wenqian's constant whackings to wake up xD daniel ong came to our school! and hes my idol man, super cool guy and dj :D

after todays filming module, couldnt help but try to take a few shots. heh heh, my photography sucks mann O.O

Life
a beautiful and heartless journey.
Love
something no amount of money can buy.
Priceless.

N stands for Not even close is this gonna end.
O stands for Open your eyes and smile man :D
P stands for your Patience in waiting for the pictures which took such a long time to upload :S
Q stands for how even the Queen can never break our friendship!
R stands for how much you rock being such an awesome friend xD
S stands for how you kicked me when you where Sleeping in the library
T stands for how fast Time flies and yet our friendship still so strong
U stands for why U must make me do the harder part of the alphabet :S
V stands for how you are VERY VERY NICE MAN! *cough cough* sorry sorethroat xD
W stands for Wow to your awesome skills in photoshoping O.O
X stands for Xtremely not true bout edward cullen! hes wayy better looking!
Y stands for Y your camera quality so clear O.O
Z stands for zooloo!!! :D

HAHAH!

my hands are shaking. not feeing like doing anything any more.
my mind is swirling. i just cant concentrate.
my world is crashing. so much coming in blows.
every part of me is breaking apart
im sorry

masking tape helps to provide free waxing O.O

aw man cant sleep O.O just heard the cuckhoo clock cuckhoo. heh heh. just found out on eprogress that my module starts at 8.30 tomorrow, hahah! so cool xD got a few minutes to linger around and do some stuff after flag raising :D hmmm. but what, is the question O.O

kk. gonna pack some stuff and off to dreamland i goo..

walking past noticing that expression
having no second thoughts or regrets as i reached out for you.
slowly lifting my hand towards your arm covered by the fabric.
when our eyes met i could see it all play like a film in your eyes.
flashbacks of the times we talked ran through my mind.
thoughts of curiousity arousing at just that one gaze.
i wanted to question everything going on but i couldnt.
two seconds passed as both our smiles soon returned to a thin line,
walking past one another as our backs faced one another.
i felt a tinge of guilt.
i felt like i should be there when i shouldnt.
i felt a responsiblity of being there for you just like how you were for me all these years now.
Why is it that you were always there for me but yet i cant be there for you.
im sorry

aw man O.O arent these pics cute xD HAHAH! :D i think im going crazy.

Truth is what everyone wants but yet they themselves show lies on their faces.

DOESNT THIS SONG ROCK SOOO MUCH! HAHAH! :D addictive isnt it? :] you should check out their music video man xD their dancing is out of this world :D HAHAH!

aw man. this week is just modules all the way, kinda dull. heh. :S and next week is gonna be the last week of school before the june hols then major testsss all the way :S AHHH. time too fast eh? sigh.

do you know how much it hurts.
how much it pains one to hear just those simple words.
well, one cant help it.
one thought that she has already gotten over it a long time ago.
but in reality one hasnt.
not at all.

AW MAN DONT THEY ALL LOOK SUPER COOL?!!? xD they look so different O.O

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. feel like dyinggg...

there are 3 tests tomorrow in one day and im no where close to finishing studying any of them. argh. tomorrow im gonna glue my butt to the chair and glue the chair to the floor so i wont wander bout but i doubt so. ahhh. aw man. got to concentrate later in the afternoon :S argh. kk gonna sleep now. byeeee.

close your eyes.
listen to whats around you.
look around not with your eyes
but with your heart
and you will discover many things you never knew existed.

back off. the emotions within me is already enough to kill me.

what the hell was i thinking.
what the hell have i done.
i cant help but think about all those thoughts that ran through my mind.
all those days that i went through self denial.
all those feelings that ran through me.
blasting this music as loudly as i can into my ears has no effect on me.
its not helping. not even the slightest bit.
i got work to finish but yet i cant concentrate.
come on ruth. you got to concentrate.
hah. how much more idoitic can i get.
what the hell was i thinking.
im sorry.

sorry to the one i truely owe my life to.

3CO ROCKS OUT LOUD xD HAHAH! :D last night was our mother's day celebration and it rockedd!!! :D aw man will never forget that beautiful night with the full moon :D hahah! ranging from how the committees and class reps all seriously rock out loud! to how it all started off at the classroom being with xueqi, jemima, maryanne and zarah at the classroom thinking of ways to keep the place super clean xD moving the tables and chairs with jemima, maryanne, agatha, zarah, shanna (good exercise eh?) :D watching how shanna attempts to hide under the tree xD meeting up with pearl and silyn at the paranakan garden :D sitting with alex bout the script and how much she totally rocked the stage at mcee-ing xD erin's totally awesome violin piece :D jemima's totally cool piano skills, singing and deep yos :D celine and silyn 's totally touching and beautiful singing that seriously bring tears to ones eyes :D the totally admirable and funky singing of the mini choir :D dancing to the music :D to the games we all played with the mothers and washing their feet :D sitting by the stairs with ariel, agatha and alex as we ate stuff xD reading of the scripts by our classmates which can really leave us all deep in thought :D being called a loser by fellow agatha for not being able to press the lift button O.O carrying the stuff with the super stong and mini miss sie xD walking around to pack some stuff up :D HAHHAHHA! overall, the night seriously rocked :D plus the full moon really completed it all.

i felt so weak, so tired.
slowly dragging my feet to the room,
putting all my weight on my bed as i closed my eyes.
all of a sudden i woke up staring out of a window.
i wasnt in my bedroom any longer.
darkness surrounded the place as the peaceful moonlight shone in.
turning my head,
i saw you right beside where i sat.
your eyes were closed as you slept soundly.
my mind worked as if you were supposed to be there.
i couldnt take my eyes off of this "moment".
i slowly lowered myself to the ground as i returned to sleep.
all of a sudden, i felt myself jerk as i woke up once again.
this time i was in my bedroom.
i sat up staring out of the window staring back at me.
i turned my head but you weren't there.
somehow that "moment" replayed once again in my head.
seeing you there truely brought a smile to my face..

heyyys sorry for takin so long :S well, heres it is! xD hahah!!! :D

dear alex,
you are damn nice, super talented in singing, seriously not fat or ugly (NOT EVEN CLOSE) and super funny that can sometimes even lead me to choke on my food while reading that short few numbered words, HAHA!!! xD

thanks wenqian!!!!! aw man plus so sorry for the suddeness, heh heh :]
sorry trees :S

i cant stand it.
how is it that when its infront of me
i cannot achieve it.
all those times i cried for it,
hoping for the opportunity once again.
today its back but no.
i cannot fufil that wish.
now it stands right infront of me.
just one more step to that dream. that very dream i have wished for since young.
but no im not allowed to.
i have no one to blame but myself.
how idoitic i really feel right now.
what an idoit.
that day i left, that day i told myself i never wanted to encounter again
hurt me so much in the heart.
i knew this day would come sooner or later
why this bad. why this fast?
im sorry the impacts too huge.
the reasons and tears too much.
but why all these tears and sorrow?
when its me whos not willing to try.
when its me feeling too afraid to ask once more.
continuously pondering over it.

just so you know, this feeling is taking control of me and i cant help it.

hey :D a math test tomorrow :S todays bio test was heh heh. O.O can die. :S AHHH. nevermind now lets concentrate on a math eh? :D

O.O

I shouldn't love you, but I want to
I just can't turn away
I shouldn't see you, but I can't move
I can't look away

how many times did i have to cross my shadow just to get closer to you.

AHHH!!! chargin my phone and freaking out over bio now o.O sigh. heh heh :S cats rocked!!! HAHA! even though wenqian kinda freaked out when the cats were near the audience and the urgent feeling of going to the toliet xD HAAHAH!

kinda missed the bus stop and ended up walking up and down, heh heh xD sorry larh wenqian! O.O at the plaza we soon discovered kfc's new breakfast meal! WAFFLES AND EGG. the waffles were not bad but the eggs. heh heh, you should try it soon to see what i mean xD went to a pet shop to stare at dogs and hamsters and fluffy rabbits xD HAHA! they were all super young and cute larh xD walked around and around and around and around somemore took the mrt to city hall to the esplanade plus learnt something today. bakuteh may be nice but keep note of which shop it is first. o.O

here are the pics! :D my photography skills kinda suck O.O heh heh xD wenqian! hope you upload them today too xD HAHA!!!

(from ruth's point of view)

















(pic that tricks one mind xD try movin around and see if its clearer!!!)

neoreul saranghanda ipgae maemdola

bonjour! :] presently connected two mouse-s to the laptop! HAHA! so cool xD sigh. cant wait for cats concert with wenqian later!!! A FEW MORE HOURS!!! xD so yuppp!!! got to go to school to hand in somethin first though :S heh heh heh xD aw man got to remember to bring the tickets O.O or else wenqian will slaughter me to pieces O.O HAHAHH!!! gotta pack my stuff soon o.O starting to see cats singing :S

sigh. somehow throat hurts a little :S hope the danzen takes effect soon o.O went out for dinner with my family and notice how people keeps starin at my clothes. heyy!!! its not that bad! i think o.O wa lao. wenqian you better not say, " uhhh. you look like a guy." again ah. HAHA! somehow still able to imagine your expression after the many times you said that. hmmm. yeah i know my taste of clothing pretty much sucks but dont have to stare man O.O

singapores on orange alert O.O the swine flu is worsening each single day. sigh. kinda scary thinking bout when its gonna hit singapore huh? :S high possibility that schools closing down for a period of time. sigh :S hmm. go singapore!!!

im in love with the lyrics.

I’m really, very foolish
I know of no one other than you
you’re looking at someone else
yet you have no idea of my feelings like this

I won’t be in your days
I won’t be in the memories either, however
only you, I looked only at you
and the tears keep coming

As i watch you walking past, I’m still happy
even yet you still don’t know my heart
I should stop this and go

I really want to see the day
I’m withstanding the pain each day
“I love you” is playing on my lips
Alone once again, crying for you
alone once again, missing for you
Baby, I love you, I’m wiating for you

I won’t be in your days
I won’t be remembered either, however
only you, I looked only at you
I’m making memories alone

Loving you is like having a beautiful wound
I look at your pretty smile also
but I cannot laugh with you

I’m thinking about you so much everyday
my heart is hurting in all these sad days
‘I want to see you’ is playing on my lips
alone once again, crying for you
alone once again, missing for you
Baby, i’m waiting for you, I love you

bye bye, never say goodbye
even though I cannot hold you like this
I need you, I cannot say anything more, I want you
I keep on hoping too, I’ll keep hoping….

I really want to see the day
I’m withstanding the pain each day
“I love you” is playing on my lips
Alone once again, crying for you

I’m thinking about you so much everyday
my heart is hurting in all these sad days
‘I want to see you’ is playing on my lips
alone once again, crying for you
alone once again, missing for you
Baby, i’m waiting for you, I love you

-Because I'm stupid by SS501
(english translation)

▪ Super Junior's Sorry Sorry
to meet heechul one day!!!!!!
for awesome dreams to never end :S unless when it becomes a nightmare then. wakeee me upp :D
PLAY LUNIA WITH MY DEAR LUNIA BUDDY!!! WENQIANNN!!! but then. singapore server not available D:<
chance to go star gazing
chance to enjoy the sunset at the sea side
adobe after effects programme
a machine to go back to the past
song recommendations
MENTOSS xD
learn the true meaning of life
lots of stuff my dear friend, lots of stuff xD
something ive already failed in.

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